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    Managing Your Career

    Professional Etiquette at Two Critical Moments

    Starting, or leaving, a job presents unique challenges.

    Professional Etiquette at Two Critical Moments
    David G. Jensen, Contributing Editor04.01.21
    There are two critical moments in your career, times when you’ll be judged by the way that others read your actions. One of them comes when you first join your employer, through the clues that you leave behind in the job offer discussion. The other important moment comes at the back end of this career move—hopefully many years later—when for some reason you decide to pass along your resignation.

    In both of these scenarios, you’ll have challenges and opportunities. But the common ground here is that your actions will either set you up for high regards by all or send negative reviews out into the world that will never go away. Choose your actions carefully in these two scenarios as your professional reputation is at stake.

    From Offer Discussion to Start Date and Beyond
    It’s great to get a job offer. But it can be stressful, right? Particularly if it needs work! And when that happens, you’ll be the one who needs to improve the offer in order to move ahead. While this month’s column isn’t focused entirely on job offers, the way you deal with them is an important element of your initial reputation because the attitude you exhibit at that time will resonate far beyond that short meeting. (Email me for reprints of our 2-part series on Job Offer Negotiation from the 2006 edition of Contract Pharma.)

    Perhaps it’s an HR associate who brought the offer to your attention—that’s OK, they know the ropes and they’ve done it many times before. But in some cases, it’s your prospective boss or your boss’s boss making the call after a successful interview. Companies do that because this person is your connection to the opening, and likely one of the reasons for your positive decision to join. But that scenario could be uncomfortable, and it’s a complicated communication environment. Negotiating with the person who you will end up working for? That’s not easy!

    As a headhunter, I’m engaged with job offers all the time, and I love it when a client company allows me to extend the offer. More get accepted that way, because as the “middleman” I can find solutions that one side or the other may not be thinking of. But it happens rarely. Over my 35 years, I’ve felt like a sports fan most of the time—high up in the stadium seats, looking down and watching two parties bump heads on the field. Here are some of my observations on how candidates get their points across more professionally, allowing them to walk away with reputations intact.

    Four Considerations When Responding to a Job Offer
    1. Remember you’re on equal ground. It’s easy to think that the other party is comfortable and confident in presenting the job offer, but that’s not the case. No one likes to talk about money; that person on the other end of the phone line is just as uncomfortable as you are. Consider it your job to put him or her at ease. Do so with a friendly attitude and an upbeat reception to the call.
    2. Job offers require a lot of work and deserve respect. Even the worst job offer in the world took a hiring manager a good deal of work. Your prospective boss had to check references, present her reasoning for the hire and justification within the budget, collect signatures from her boss and perhaps the boss’s boss, and more. No matter how it appears to you at first glance, it deserves a thanks. “Susan, I know it’s not easy to push a job offer through its paces, so before we even discuss the rest of the details, thank you for this.”
    3. It’s not a win-lose situation. Everything you’ll ever read about negotiation tells you to strive for a balance between your needs and the employer’s needs. Never think that your talents are so unique that the employer must bend to your every wish. And the best way for both parties to feel comfortable is for you to do as much advance work as the employer. Know what is critical to you, what costs you’ll incur, how you’ll want to deal with all the issues to be discussed, even the start date. Be ready, be planned.
    4. Avoid email. There’s nothing worse than a poorly-written email reply to a job offer. Unless you’re simply writing with an acceptance or confirmation of a start date, email can be misinterpreted in many ways. Recently I read an email where English wasn’t that person’s native language. He meant to say that it was tricky to decide on the offer because of all the different elements, and instead he implied that the offer was “full of tricks.” Picking up your laptop to write a reply to an offer? Put down the computer. Pick up the phone.

    Your Reputation When Leaving the Employer and Giving Notice
    The rules of how we interact—how we conduct business and go about our daily lives—are in flux. Sure, as the old saying goes, “change is constant,” and I get that. But my head is spinning from the way that people treat one another now. You see it on TV and in politics, and it is definitely there in the workplace as well.

    But despite these changes, and the ease of firing off uncomfortable language or really nailing a jerk of a boss, you need to think carefully about how you resign. Even in situations where the company has mistreated its employees in the past through layoffs and such. You can’t let that impact the way that you leave.

    I’ve been mistreated by employers, and I know that many readers have been as well. I’ve been handed a box and told that I need to move along. Anyone who has ever been downsized, right-sized, or just plain fired knows that companies can be cruel at times. Some companies have found a way to do it with heart, but the majority do it badly. It’s no fun to have a company take years of hard work from you and then, seemingly on a moment’s notice, decide that they don’t need you any longer. Today you should be ready for something like this and be confident that you can bounce back quickly. Always have a CV updated, learn the warning signs of program funding that is going to be cut, or development projects that have turned south.

    But the worst thing possible for your professional reputation is to stick it to your employer when you leave. Even with a bad boss, or a bad company, your professional reputation deserves the respect you generate from giving a proper notice. Recently, a client told me about a fellow who left on a Friday afternoon, telling his boss that he was starting a new job on Monday morning with no notice whatsoever. “Two weeks’ notice is just a professional courtesy,” he replied to the client HR head. “I didn’t feel that it was necessary as I would probably have been shown to the door anyway.” Now there’s a response that has long-term career implications!

    Despite what would happen when you give notice, your reputation demands that you provide that “professional courtesy.” Yes, in some cases, the employer won’t want you hanging around. But in others, they’ll have you implement a planned transition, moving your projects to some-one else and generally using the time to ensure nothing falls between the cracks.
    Here are a few guidelines for resignation day:
    1. Leave your personal feelings out of the resignation letter. The resignation letter is short and sweet. It’s not a place for you to fill with “you guys should have done this or that” commentary.
    2. How much notice is relevant for you? In the U.S., two weeks is common, but candidates often give 3-4 weeks’ notice. Just remember, it can get mighty uncomfortable in that fourth week.
    3. Review the paperwork from your hire. You may have signed something that speaks specifically about your notice period.
    4. Avoid counter-offers like the plague. Yes, it feels good, but no, it’s not a good career move. All the reasons you wanted to leave in the first place will come back in spades.

    Mutual Respect – The Key to Maintaining Professional Reputation
    Throughout difficult conversations like the job offer, or in stressful situations like a resignation, the best way to ensure your reputation remains intact is to show a degree of mutual respect. Treat the other party with respect and he or she will walk away an advocate for you, ensuring support during your new job or a positive reference after your departure. Your professional reputation precedes you in all that you do, and it ensures a steady stream of opportunities and headhunter calls down the road!


    David G. Jensen
    Contributing Editor
    Dave Jensen is CEO and Founder of CTI Executive Search. He can be reached at (928) 274-2266 or via davejensen@careertrax.com; www.careertrax.com.

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